The Cost of Grace: Unboxing the Unqualified

I know what it’s like to be utterly dismissed and unseen. For years, I was just a label—a runaway kid with no identity, living in a void. My suffering was so heavy, so silent, that the only time it became visible was in a hospital bed or behind the locked doors of a psychiatric ward.

I carried that emptiness alone. And yet, here is the strange, beautiful truth: even when I felt I had no life left in me, my deepest instinct was to serve and help others. It was my desperate way of pouring light into someone else while feeling empty myself. I was physically present in the darkness, but even then, my soul was being held.

I didn’t choose that painful life. I didn’t choose the harsh curriculum of the streets. I didn’t choose the specific avenue of my ministry. He gave it to me, designed it for me.

The Audacity of God’s Design and the Gift of Grace

My friends, please listen closely: No one gets to tell you where you can and cannot go. Your story is meant to start in those humble, often painful, beginnings.

What brought me out was not just hope, but blind faith. It was the quiet conviction that a plan was already in me, waiting to be Willed—one step at a time. I trust the assurance of things unseen (Hebrews 11:1), because I know God knew exactly what I could endure. This is the truth of Divine Sovereignty—His dominion is the only one that counts.

For 30 years, I didn’t have a safe place. Then I found a soft landing spot with my husband and his family. I know how rare that is, because a lot of people don’t get that. But I also know the deep truth: my safety wasn’t ultimately about them, and it wasn’t about me. They took me in and helped me to see I was kept, not by their efforts, but by the redeemed Jesus Christ. It was an act of pure, tangible grace.

If I, a person defined by the system, can stand here, then understand this: no human authority—not a doctor, not a forensic psychologist—can define you. Their labels are secondary. Only God can define and decide.

A Heartfelt Word to Our Leaders: Discard the World’s Cost

I want to speak to the leaders now, and I ask you to listen with an open heart.

I know your path was not easy. Many of you paid a heavy price in school and time to earn your position, and you feel that because you took the long road, everyone else must, too. But that personal cost can sometimes blind you. It can create a quiet resentment, almost an envy of some.sort, when you see God immediately empower a person who was broken but is now restored.

It’s the “I paid my dues” trap. You confuse the methods of the world (institutional achievement) with the mandate of the Kingdom (empowerment through grace).

When you require attendance at every ritual as the only mark of value, you create the stagnant accord. You forget the Theological Principle of the Priesthood of All Believers (1 Peter 2:9). Every single restored person is a priest, qualified to minister! When you say, “You are not ready because you missed Bible study,” you are judging with human eyes.

Recognizing the Design in Difference

We also need to acknowledge that many people have disabilities that stop them from certain things, like constantly being in people’s faces or being in group settings. These limitations often mean they study and pray at home, outside the traditional setting of the church.

And here is the absolute truth that must guide your leadership: The Bible doesn’t say this is the only right way, only you do. When you enforce these rules, you act outside the authority of Scripture. The Lord uses these very differences as gifts so people can relate and use their experience as powerful testimonies.

That soul may not be ready for a formal leadership position, but they are absolutely qualified to save souls and add to the Kingdom. Their life is the curriculum! No one is disqualified because you say so!

The Biblical command for you is clear: You are meant to equip the saints for the work of ministry (Ephesians 4:12).

If you are struggling with addiction, your recovery is not just for you. It is the deep comfort (2 Corinthians 1:4) you will use to gently guide the person beside you out of the same pit.
If you are unseen because you don’t fit the mold, your testimony is the living, breathing evidence of a soul resurrected. Your quiet service is priestly work.

The Bridge: Why Leaders Are Essential

I do not write this to tear down your position. I write this because the church leaders are needed. God wants you to use your platform to make fundamental change for His Kingdom, and changing your perspective is the start.

This is why I serve as a Mental Health Coach. My mission is to teach leaders how to truly see and effectively treat people who were where I was, those struggling, labeled, and feeling unseen. We must learn to translate grace into actionable empathy.

My ministry’s foundation is this: Your purpose is not found in an attendance sheet. It is forged in the fire you survived, and your only true qualification is the redemptive grace that kept your soul.

TRUST GOD. He designed your pain for a purpose. Now walk that path and use that design to give light. Don’t let anyone tell you where you can and cannot go.

Comment Prompt:

Where in your own life—past or present—did you feel most disqualified by the world, only to realize that was the exact place God was preparing your ministry? Share your story below.